It's official - I have to undergo a surgery for my nose problem. So much for the 'conservative measures'. I had a yucky session at the specialist's yesterday. He spray some bitter anesthesia into my nose and in went the pipe. It wasn't painful, just uncomfortable... I had my eyes closed and my fists clenched throughout the process. 3 mins later, I had a few pictures of my inner nose taken. My doc was brisk and to the point... so, I barely had time to freak out and it was over... guess it's a good thing.

Then I had this CT scan of my face. The scan alone costs $450. I was grumbling and wondering why a scan costs so much until I laid my eyes on the magnificent piece of equipment. I thought such things only existed on TV... it elevates, moves left and right and when my eyes are closed, I felt as though I was in a space shuttle. According to bunny, the scan helps to 'cut' the head into 64 slices so doctors can have a more accurate and detailed 'look' at the problem areas.

The results - There were some blockages in the airways around the head and cheek area, and for the first time, I could understand the what the docs meant by 'inner septum deviation'... the bone was obviously curved.

He told me that he will need to er... cut away some parts of the soft bone inside to straighten it and to drain out the fluids. Honestly... I am not looking forward to tainting my 23-year record of not being cut or stitched. Now, I have to go under general anesthesia to knock me out ($1000) and get cut with a ($320) blade (maybe i can request to bring it home after surgery to make sashimi). The total bill will come up to $7500. Looking at the price and the possible amount of pain... I'm thinking of abandoning the plan. I've lived with it for so long, I might as well put up with it somemore right? The only thing is that... I'm afraid it might become worse, it's the cause of the headaches and throat problems after all. Weighing the pros and cons. Argh.

Anys, all these made me reflect on how lucky I am. At least it's not cancer... and I'm really touched by the people around me... not just with regards to this matter.

Bunny is really really good to me. She skipped work to ferry me and my parents around, stayed with me when my parents got a little sqeamish (who wouldn't?), counselled me when I got scared... researched more on the matter. There are many occasions where she inconvenienced herself to make sure I'm comfortable. She makes me feel very loved. Bunny's mum too... small things like getting chilli padi and making herbal drinks. Peng peng... who always makes me smile with her msgs, tells me not to worry and calls me silly pearrrrrl- for some reason, it makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Colleagues... who are really Friends. They listen, they give advice, laugh together. Nel is like the older sister I wished I had, she's caring, she asks about my head, scolds peng peng and I when necessary. Mad cooks the most fantastic stuff AND lugs all the containers (labelled, cos the portions are according to our preferences) to work so we can have home-cooked food for dinner- as Shuping said, she's very kind. Jen doesn't mind bringing up some unhappy parts of her past just to lend me some advice, Gladys looks out for us to make sure that we are not taken advantaged of. Yeeyee is the sweetest girl ever, she's considerate and she is our resident baker, impressive. My bosses aren't what you would call bosses from hell either. I'm lucky. There are many nice people around and without them, work could've been a lot worse.