Thoughts I never had time to rearrange

Lord there are so many things that I heard but me being me, never ever spend time processing things, always looking to watch the world go by at top speed, but I am weary tonight.

I heard this sermon on salvation, about how salvation is free and comes at no cost; yet, following you, comes at a cost. Today, or the past few days, I realised how little I was willing to give up for you, when you gave up your life for me.

I couldn't give up the way I spend my money, I couldn't give up my time for you, I couldn't choose you over Facebook, over reading useless things. You have not even asked me to sacrifice my life, or take a big step, to give up on my job or people for you. How could I? When the simple creature comforts and worldly desires, I couldn't give up. I'm trying. 

I'm sorry lord. Right now I ask for your forgiveness and for you to change my heart towards you. Holy Spirit, I've ignored you long enough, stir in me this desire to follow you. Help me, make me conscious of you in every aspect of my life. I want to love you more because you deserve nothing else but 100% from me.