Questioning why.

I'm typing this entire post using voice memo because I simply have no strength to type.

I'm really pained. A friend of mine liked someone for a very long time. Today, she found out that that he is gay. I just cannot imagine the kind of pain that she is going through. She's my very good friend and she's been suspecting this for a while but was hoping otherwise. 

Today, I really wonder why God would allow this to happen. Not because I'm upset that it meant that my friend cannot be with him. But because he has communicated his decision to leave the church because of that. 

God, why do such things happen? If he leaves the church, does it mean that he's leaving you as well? This cannot happen. Can you change his mind? Can you bring him comfort in the times where he struggles and fails, because it must have hurt him too. Can you let him know that he's very much loved by you no matter what happens? Just... Don't let him turn his back on you. He needs you more than anything else right now. I cannot fathom how anyone who has known your love and seen your miracles, could make the conscious choice to leave you. I know this could possibly happen to me but please don't test me in this manner.