I realised when someone doesn't give a shit about you. She really doesn't. :) people do change, don't they? Watching everyone settle down, I sometimes wonder - what if? What if it was just 3 years and not 6.5? I would be 26. Perhaps, it wouldn't seem so bad. Maybe, if I'm Buddhist, I would say something like - I must have owed her something in my previous life. But of cos... I'm not. That leaves us with... Shrugs.

We had a really bad fight a few weeks ago and I was really hurt and upset that this person could belittle Christians in such a way. She said that we have a strange way of comforting others - by sending verses. I admit it is the last thing that anyone non-Christian needs, or even something someone Christian needs, if the verse doesn't work. There were times where she voiced that she was uncomfortable with me talking about God and I stopped - but eventually, she was always the one who brought up that she thought about things much later and agreed with what I said. The thing is I never needed her to agree with me, but I needed her to think. With such mixed signals, I couldn't tell that she was That uncomfortable.

Back to the verses, I do not always send her verses, usually, I keep her company when she was feeling down and out and obviously, when there was no one around, or she wouldn't have called me. Especially since I'm not one of those people she would meet regularly or on a whim.

Somehow everything added up when she told me to stay in the same Eco system - my workplace that is surrounded by Christians. I don't know, I just flared. I'm quick to anger, I admit. And usually, when I cool down, I would usually feel that things were not so bad. But this time round, it didn't go away and I still feel that it is thoroughly unjustified and very rude. It's as though she wrote me off somewhere - from being a friend, to a Christian. Nothing more.


So we stayed away from communicating until I decided to contact her because I thought... It's this friend... She's more than that and it's not worth not talking over this argument. So I texted her and she was obviously still mad.

So yes, since then, it has been strange. I seriously don't know where this is heading. I'm prepared that this will remain the way it is and we just maybe be strangers one day.

This morning, she texted and asked what I was doing. I figured it's because she was hinting abt passing S the guitar. But, I was actually quite glad to maybe able to catch her for a short while and maybe talk a bit and return the guitar. But her itinerary changed and she didn't feel the need to text and I was rushing my agent to hurry up for nothing. :) when I texted, it was with barely concealed anger and sarcasm. She doesn't care!

Haha... Sometimes, I wonder why I bother.